We're all about adorable one-piece suits. And who doesn't love an itsy bitsy bikini? But monokinis are the Frankenstein of swimwear—a science experiment gone awfully awry.
Just like crop-tops and cut-out dresses, when you wear a monokini you risk some serious skin spillage. Also, isn't half the point of wearing a bathing suit so you can lay out in the sun? Clearly the monokini was poorly designed, because you're bound to get random splotches of tan-line (or sunburn... ouch).
Mullet hemlines—or high-low (or asymmetrical if you want to be fancy)—are dead to us. A little asymmetry is always interesting and flattering, but a dramatic drop in the hem makes you look like you have a mullet on your tush—and who wants a mullet on their tush?!
The same argument against flatforms generally goes for sneaker wedges as well. If you want to wear sneakers, great! There are plenty of super cool high-top kicks waiting to be worn. And if you want to wear wedges, we know there are a bunch of pretty options out there on the market. But sneaker wedges just look like puffy marshmallows on your feet that generally don't flatter. And the Velcro! Please. Stop.